I've been looking back, recollecting and thinking about how come I still haven't met that right girl yet. This year hasn't been really a good year for relationships for me. I tried asking a couple of girls out with much fail, and finally after thinking all is lost, she gave me hope but then took it away (see Zada in the last few posts).
I don't know why all these thoughts are coming into my mind lately. It must have been when I saw Marian the other day in this Citibank event that my mom lugged me into. Bitter bitter truth: she was still kinda cold to me (maybe a bit frosty even) and for some unexplainable reason, that left me really depressed and silly after.
Right now I'm involved with someone but just for the fun of it. Kinda felt bad at first since I'm not used to that kind of setup, but it kinda works itself out when I'm really feeling terribly lonely. I know this is temporary, and might have to end it before the year ends or whenever, still deciding on that part.
I guess pretending not to be lonely is making me even lonelier, seeing all my friends being in couples, kinda makes me crave for being in that serious relationship again, heh even though I know how much of a headache it is at times. Someone to bring home to the folks to and introduce them to. Having to know that I won't grow old and die a lonely man. Melloncholic, I know, but to be honest, this is all the feelings I'm having right now. From experience, I know this is a phase, so let me have my god damn moment for tonight...
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